It’s your last piece of gum – what do you do? Do you give it begrudgingly? Maybe you say “I don’t have it” and keep it for yourself? Or maybe you freely give the piece away knowing that you can always get another piece of gum later.
Now change the word “gum” to “love”. How free and open are you with giving?
Unlike gum, love is free. I’m never lacking in or have to re-up on love. As I give love, I am instantly supplied with more.
Love should come at no cost to the giver or to the receiver so let me say this: if you are forcing or begging someone to love you, look deep inside and give your heart a makeover.
Ask yourself: are you open to giving and receiving love? Do you seek validation from others? How do you feel when you aren’t validated by others?
By the way, the only validation you need is when you park in a lot or garage.
These days, I’m like Oprah when I give love – you get some love, you get some love – WE ALL GET SOME LOVE! Why? Because I have an endless supply, my heart is open, and I enjoy sharing it with others.
I know we’ve all heard “if you can’t love yourself, how can you love someone else?”. Well, you can show love to others when you don’t love yourself, but what are you looking for in return? Most times it’s validation because we are looking for someone to give it back to us. In that instance, we are giving love in order to receive love.
But that’s not how relationships work. Seeking others for validation puts them in an uneasy spot. Imagine having to always try to make someone feel good – my gosh, the pressure! That is exhausting!
This is why self love is important. Abundance starts with loving yourself.
How Can I Show Love?
So how can one show or give love? I always think about the five love languages when reflect on how I show love: verbal, gifts, quality time, serving others, and touch.
While completing the self love project, one of the actions is to compliment someone. This is showing verbal love and is the easiest way to show love. Giving thoughtful gifts shows that you listen and appreciate someone. Showing up for your friend’s event, planning a date night, stopping by to see a family member or simply LISTENING to a friend is an example of spending quality time. Pumping gas for your significant other or, in my case, putting the baby to sleep while I perform self care are awesome acts of service. Holding your sweet baby, kissing your significant other, hugging on your friend – those are acts of touch.
Everyone expresses and experiences love differently, so it’s really up to you how you want express the love you possess.
How Can I Receive Love?
One receives love by being themselves – by being true, genuine and authentic.
You won’t be everyone’s flavor and that’s fine.
I know everyone doesn’t like chocolate, but I do so I eat it up (more for me, right?).
The best way I show love to myself is through positive self talk and self care. Today’s self care consists of spending some alone time with my husband while the baby sleeps tonight. We both deserve a wind down sans baby girl, and I really enjoy our time together!
Wanna join the Self Love Project?
Start here: Self Love Project 2018